So this week, for the first time in nearly 6 months, I went to a Widows catch up.. and it was exactly the right thing to do. I have missed that connection with other people who totally understand what this grief stuff is like. There are people who are very new to the journey, and others who are much further along, and it feels good (and I know how weird that sounds!) to make those connections.

I hadn’t realised quite how much I have been missing and needing that. I had kind of talked myself out of going while in my relationship, choosing to spent time with my person instead, and while I don’t have any regrets, I have realised that the group gives me something that I can’t get anywhere else, and I am able to give back in there as well…. It’s a nice feeling.

The other big thing that I have done this week, is to book a trip! At my work, I have to apply for annual leave at least 6 months in advance. Last minute stuff just doesn’t get approved, and single days are very hit and miss (it’s a whole story on its own, and it makes me cranky! Lol) So in September last year I put in for some time off in April – the original plan was for D and I to go to New Zealand and do a loop of the South Island. That idea is now not going to work, but I still want a holiday… so my girlfriend and I decided quite spontaneously to go to Vietnam.

I’m pretty excited for it, and in the true spirit of spontaneity the whole thing was booked and paid for within 24 hours! We will be gone for 11 days, travelling from Ho Chi Min city up to Hanoi with several stops along the way and will be using all manner of transportation – and even though it is a fully organised tour, I am looking at it as a proper adventure – and will do the usual ‘tour guide’ blogs on the way.

It feels great to have that to look forward to. I thought for a while there that this year might be one without travel – it is not something I want to do on my own, so to now have that has given me a real lift. There is some anxiety around all the modes of transportation – I am incredibly prone to motion sickness, but I will be seeking some advice from the professionals on how to best deal with it! … I won’t let a bit of vomit stop me! Hahaha!

It’s been a good week. The anxiety rollercoaster is a thing that is always there, but the highs count as much as the lows, and I’m taking it as a win.