This week has been a bit of a rollercoaster again. It was my week off work, which is always nice, but I ended up feeling quite overwhelmed with everything I had to do.

My problem, especially at this time of the year is that I find myself over committing to a bunch of social things and then losing the motivation to do the things that I have to do, all of which leads to a teary, anxiety riddled breakdown. I did the very same thing last year too and told myself that I would set myself better boundaries this year – clearly that didn’t work.

I am behind on my Christmas shopping, and wrapping, and cooking… and then overwhelmed with the list of things that I still have to do. I’m not entirely sure that it will all get done – the gingerbread definitely won’t haha, but I will plug away at it and do my best!

I am looking forward to Christmas, although this year looks different for us again. There have been quite a lot of changes in the last three and a half years, and missing Claytie is definitely a huge part of that. This year there is a location change for my families celebration, my sister has offered to host at her place in Laidley instead of it being at my parents house. For the first time ever I am working on Christmas Day – although my traditional Brekky will still happen in the morning – the baked beans are just too good to miss out on, and other family catch ups will also be very different this year which is another adjustment to get through. I’m such a creature of routine (or just very very German) that all the changes are adding to my anxiety.

On the upside, I’ve done a lot of very nice social things in the last week. I went to the beach to catch up with one of my friends, had a very nice dinner with someone special, spent a day driving to Redcliffe to drop off some mobility aids for a friend who hurt herself (get better soon MA) and had a sing along with 7000 people at pub choir. I had drinks with a bunch of friends at a craft brewery and finished the weekend at the beach catching up with another friend. The Squish has been over a couple of times to swim in my pool – and that is always the best thing. Socially my cup is very full!

I know all of the stuff that worries me will be fine, it always is, and I know that it’s ok to take a minute and let the emotions hit. This is all part of the chaos that happens in my world. Hopefully this next week is kind to me, and my organisational skills are on point! The count down is on… we can do this!