So this week I did another kind of first for me… I went and had a little adventure on my own.

I got up early on one of my days off and took myself to watch the sun come up. That one was not something new. I do it often and I love it. The stillness of the morning, watching as people and wildlife start to wake up and move around. The glow on the horizon as the sun makes her way around, and then the glorious colours of the sky as she passes the horizon. It is a beautiful peaceful and contemplative way to start the day.

It is always my go to when I have a lot to think about, and at the moment I feel like there’s a whole lot going on in my brain. Not necessarily anything new, but just a bunch of stuff needing attention. We are still in the middle of big dates for us, and that takes a whole lot of emotion, The second guessing and analysing everything all of the time isn’t a whole lot of fun either, so being able to switch it off for a bit is always nice… and you really can’t complain about the view!

While I was sitting and enjoying the slow warming up, and the colours in the sky, I remembered a conversation I had recently had with a friend about a walk he did. He did it with some of his other friends, and the photos looked amazing. I have been wanting to do it for ages, and thought why not!? So off I toddled… another hour or so in the car into the hinterland (with a phone call to my mum so someone would know where I was!) I’m not great at taking in scenery when I’m driving – too busy focusing on the road in front of me, but the bits that I did see were beautiful, and if there had been places to stop (or less traffic) I would have spent a whole lot more time admiring the scenery.

I managed to get to my destination without too much hassle – probably another first because I am shocking with directions, fight with my gps all the time and don’t really enjoy driving! But I made it! Because it was still really early, there was not another person around, no other cars in the car park, and lots of shadowy places, my big girl pants were needed to get me out of the car, but I did it… totally on my own!

The walk I chose is not the longest, but that was ok. It was beautiful! Massive trees and moss covered rocks, a sound track of bird noises and the rushing of water over the rocky creek bed. A path that was lovely to walk on, with steps and viewing platforms at regular intervals. It was a proper feast for the eyes – although a little bit weird with no other people anywhere. I did as I do, and took about a million photos, it was stunning!

I did the loop, and got back in the car with the idea of heading home. My sense of direction (or lack the of) sent me the opposite way to how I had come, which added to the adventure. A beautiful road, tree lined on both sides that then opened up to a stunning hinterland vista. Honestly, so beautiful! A drive through the country side toward Murwulimbah and then back onto the more familiar highway.

It was so so beautiful…. And honestly one of the hardest and loneliest things I have ever done. I should have loved it – and I did in part, but not having someone to share it with actually brought home again just how hard losing your person really is. It would have been the most perfect day to share with someone, instead it was kind of miserable. Music playing in the background is a pretty poor substitute for the conversations I would have loved to have had.

Part of me is glad that I did it… I now know that I can, and that I will be ok. The other part of me just wants to (and did) cry at the loneliness. I can’t say that I won’t do it again, I want to do and see ALL the things. I want to travel and have adventures and live my very best life; but I am way too much of a people person to enjoy being on my own for things like this… so, if you’re off on an adventure, and you want some company, keep me in mind! … and if you want to go for a hike in nature and see a beautiful waterfall, I’ve been to one that I can show you – assuming I can find my way back there!